How Being Realistic is Ruining Your Life

Being realistic in life is one of those things that seems like a good idea at the time, but actually isn’t. Like bleaching your hair at home or eating deep fried butter.

I’m talking about when you have a dream or idea that you are inspired to act on and then you let reality get in the way. "I'm too fat to run a marathon...", "Nobody would buy that product...", "I'm too young for people to take me seriously..." (that was mine). The list of excuses that your ego* disguises as the ever important "reality" is endless.


The Truth About Reality

Reality is the leading cause of stress among those in touch with it.
— Lily Tomlin

You see, the thing about reality is that if you give it too much of your attention it will keep you stuck in it, forever. Nothing new can come from being in touch with reality. In fact, being realistic is a sure fire way to kill your dreams before they even have a chance.

Change, innovation, and newness all come from the imagination. Using your imagination to see past reality is how you create amazing things in life.

I think people like to be realistic because they are afraid. Either afraid of failure or afraid of change… But honestly, the only thing we should be afraid of is static sameness. Because as soon as you stop growing, expanding, and evolving you die. (I mean this figuratively and literally.)


Being Realistic Keeps You Stuck in a Never Ending Cycle of Sameness

Do you ever feel like your life keeps presenting you with the same situation over and over again? 

For example, if every time you meet a new guy he always ends up breaking your heart in the same way as the last. Or, no matter what job you try, you still run into the same problem of not being respected by your boss. It's always same situation, different day.

The bad news is this means you are stuck in (what I like to call) the observation and reaction mode. The good news is you don't have to be. #freeyoself

Observation and reaction mode is when you are constantly observing the circumstances of your life (how they are in reality) and reacting to them accordingly (by default). Something bad happens, you get upset. Something good happens you become happy. Life is very conditional when lived in this way.

The problem with this lifestyle is that it keeps you in a never ending cycle of sameness because of the Law of Attraction. You see, when something bad or unwanted happens you become upset. Then you keep attracting more things that will make you upset because you are currently upset. You are now a vibrational match to upsetting things and will therefore bring more of them into your experience. Just like if something amazing happens and you get excited, you will attract more exciting things in your life because you are now a vibrational match to exciting things. (I talk more about this in these articles: What is Manifestation and Manifestation 101.)

Since whatever you focus on expands, if you always focus on the current reality you will always get more reality. #nothanks

Being realistic is the most commonly traveled road to mediocrity. Why would you be realistic? What’s the point of being realistic?
— Will Smith


So, if you want to create something new in your life (a new job, house, partner, whatever) you have to put the present circumstances aside in order to imagine it into existence. Then that can become your new reality. How exciting is that? 

The cool part is that your brain really can't tell the difference between actual reality and perceived reality. So, if you imagine, in vivid detail, exactly what you want for long enough your subconsious mind (and the Universe) will find a way to make it happen for you. That my friends, is called deliberate creation.

Besides, where you are right now almost doesn't even matter because it is a manifestation of thoughts, feeling and beliefs that you practiced in the past. Not saying it was intentional (most people are creating by default anyway), but the present moment is already old news. No point in focusing on that!

Instead of living in the observation/reaction mode, start making conscious choices rather than feeling at effect in your life. If you don't like your current reality you can choose something different. You just have to decide what you want and then really own it.

Life is supposed to happen for you, not to you. Don't get stuck in the reality trap.







There’s a certain delusional quality that all successful people have to have. You have to believe that something different than what has happened for the last 50 millions years of history- you have to believe that something different can happen.
— Will Smith


It's unrealistic to think that flipping a switch could light up an entire room.

It's unrealistic to bend a piece of metal and fly people over the ocean in it. 

It’s unrealistic to have a dream where all men are created equal.

It’s unrealistic for a little girl to rise up against the Taliban and change the world.

It’s unrealistic for a black man to become president of the United States of America.

It’s unrealistic to free the entire country of India from British rule by being peaceful.


Nobody ever created anything revolutionary by giving in to reality. Tweet It


All of these great feats were unrealistic at the time of their creation, but fortunately these people didn't care. Surely everybody around them and their own ego* told them they were crazy, but that didn't stop them. #thankgod

That's because they were and are creators. They create new things on purpose, with purpose. These are the people that drive society forward.


*A Quick Rant About Your Ego

Your ego is that annoying, not so little, voice inside your head that you think is you, but isn't. The "Voice of Reason" it likes to call itself. The ego is hard to recognize because it's so sneaky and manipulative, but I'm sure you're familiar with it.

Your ego (disguised as you) says things like... "I'm not smart/tall/handsome/funny/hard working enough." "What if something goes wrong?" "I couldn't possibly achieve that because X, Y, and Z." Sound familiar?

My point is that the only reason you may be clinging to reality is because your ego is trying to keep you in your comfort zone. Once you realize that these thoughts aren't really yours, you can begin to ignore them and follow your heart instead. That is when you can really start creating a life you love and stop being so damn realistic all the time!


Next time your ego tries to step in and bring you back down to earth you can stand your ground and shout, "NO MORE! I will not be realistic because being realistic is a dream killing poison in my life. Instead I will follow my heart, trust my intuition and create new and amazing things for myself, by choice. I will put present circumstances aside and focus on what I want instead. From this day forward, I am a deliberate creator."

Ok, maybe you don't have to shout it, but you should at least recite it out loud or, at the very least, write it down a couple of times until it starts to sink in. It will be a nice reminder that you are a badass creator of your own reality.





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How Being Realistic is Ruining Your Life