Have you ever looked at someone who seemed to have it all going on and just wondered to yourself, "What the hell do they know that I don't... How come their life is so much better than mine? What's their secret?!"
Well, I'm about to spill their secret, and it's a whole lot simpler than you might think.
Sadly, too many people go through their entire life, day by day, year by year, unconsciously settling for a life that they don't entirely like. Obviously, nobody wants that. We all want to enjoy a life worth living. We want to see the world, experience awesome things, and most importantly enjoy the ride.
So what sets apart the people who do from the people who don't?
I'll tell you what. Choice.
Choosiness as a Superpower
The people who live the best lives choose to do so. Their life has become so awesome over time thanks to a series of good feeling choices they have made. Moment-by-moment, day-by-day, and year-by-year, they make conscious choices that lead to an awesome life.
They consciously choose how they spend every moment of every day. They choose work that they enjoy. They choose a partner that's easy and fun to be with. They choose to live life to the fullest.
Unlike most people, who just go through life never giving much thought about how they want to feel, people who rock at life always know how they want to feel and they commit to doing whatever it takes to feel that way.
Basically, they are choosy. And they never settle. Not so much choosy in a snobby way, but just choosey in the "This is my life and I get to decide how it goes!" way. It's empowering. It's their superpower.
When things aren't going as well as they could be, they either choose to change the situation or choose to change their perspective about it! Perspective is everything for these people.
Also, they are constantly reevaluating their life with important questions like...
Am I enjoying how I'm spending my precious time here on earth? Do I like the person I'm being today? Do I like the people I'm hanging around with lately? If today was my last day on earth, is this how I would want to be spending it?
If the answer to any of these defining questions is "no" or even "eh" then they simply choose to change it.
You see, we always have a choice. That's the beauty of life. We all were granted the same gift of free will. When we don't like things, we can change them. And if we absolutely can't change them, we can at least change the way we think about them.
With that being said, you can always approach life from two different perspectives. One perspective feels bad to think about and the other feels good, or at least better.
You can always approach your life from two perspectives, one that feels good or one that doesn't.
For example, when you get dumped, there are two ways you can look at it. You can either wallow in self-pity and think about how you were wronged and how now you feel worthless and tossed to the side OR... you can look at it as an opportunity to take some time to yourself, an opportunity to date new and exciting people, and an opportunity to make room for a new and improved relationship.
When your house burns down you can either think about how life is unfair and focus on all the material things you lost OR... you can be thankful that you are still alive and well, despite the disaster, and think of this a fresh start with no material baggage to hold you down.
Feel the difference? You always have the capacity to take on either perspective, but it takes prioritizing feeling good and choosing to be happy to be able to fully embrace the brighter perspective.
(And here's a little pro tip: The more you do it the easier it gets! As with any new skill, practice makes perfect! The more you exercise your looking on the bright side muscles the stronger they get.)
How to Become More Choosy
In order to get good at being choosey, there are two things you should work on first. The first is your self worth. If you don't love yourself and you don't feel worthy of an awesome life, then you aren't going to make good, supportive choices because you won't feel like you deserve an awesome life.
Secondly, you gotta prioritize feeling good. When you do this, all your choices become very straight forward and easy to make. You'll be able to constantly check in with yourself and ask, "What choice feels better for me?" and then go with that one, without worrying if it's the right one.
I'll leave you with these final thoughts as you go on with your life today. How can you start to be more choosy with your life? What can you change about your life in order to make it feel better to you? What can you change your perspective about in order to feel better as well?
Answer and act on these three questions and you'll be well on your way to living your life to the fullest! If you would like to share your answers, I'd be happy to read them in the comments below.